so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
This Pinterest wedding planning is a good distraction. I'm great at this, my imaginary wedding is beautiful
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Randomize
