how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize