ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
Randomize
