I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Nothing says "sober up, you whore" quite like an early morning PAP smear.
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
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