No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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