You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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