There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
whose ass print is on the piano?
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
Had a dream that you were held at gun point. But I killed the guy. Then we embraced in the biggest hug while everyone around us clapped... Kinda how I imagine our wedding...
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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