Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize