I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Randomize
