I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
I need a hoe opinion
go on
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
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