she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Randomize