i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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