Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
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