Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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