why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
wow bdsm is so cute
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
