I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
All the doctor said was why
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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