the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
She is in my trunk
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
Randomize
