So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
The power of my boobs compel you
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
