I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Not going to lie: not even the fact I'm wearing men's cargo pants can hide the fact I have an awesome ass.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
Randomize
