she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
