Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
i told her i loved her afterwards and she said "i know," kissed me, and got up to start making breakfast.
dude, she han solo'd you. keep her.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
