Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Im just drunk enough to admit that I miss Hannah Montana.
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
