What a fucking waste of an outfit
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Randomize
