i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
