just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Randomize
