It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
STOP SETTING ME UP WITH GUYS YOU MEET ON CRAIGSLIST
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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