White coat. Heels.
Tell her she can't have a vagina
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
