What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize