ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
