wat bout pragnant strippers??
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
