I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Someone stole a lamp last night.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Randomize
