is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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