Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
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