she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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