Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
I need to get a job that holds me accountable for something. Otherwise I wake upon Monday wondering when the booze store opens and if I still have a boyfriend.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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