I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Drake has all the answers
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Just found out my dad smokes weed too. Mom, grandma, all aunts and uncles, and now my dad too. It's like I'm genetically engineered to be a stoner.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
Randomize