If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Randomize
