It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Randomize
