Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
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