Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Randomize
