Joe is yelling at the trees again.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We left an ass print on the piano.
I think this girl gave me a handjob thinking that I would help her with her cell phone bill
omg. that's awesome
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Randomize
