About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Randomize
