if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize