drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize