Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
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