so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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