I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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