Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
He just walked in the house and decided to wake everyone up by yelling "I SHIT MYSELF!" We all thought he was joking....we were all wrong.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
