Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
