i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize
