I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
this hospital has no fireball
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
