think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
textsfromlastnight.com keeps rejecting me
that alone proves you never get laid, nor have a life.. or have anything funny to contribute to the world.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
They are going to name an STD after you.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize