I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Holy shit dude........stairs
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Randomize
